Carnets de Claire #6 – The OCC 2025 with the Adaptive team

5 years

Christmas 2020, my mind fragile, imprisoned in my severed body that I don’t accept, eaten away by my toxic suffering that follows me relentlessly… I explode!

My spirit falls, shatters and gives way to reconstruction.

5 years later, after running five marathons and two 80 km races between town and country, running has become my therapy. Therapy that challenges me to go further, therapy that challenges me to overcome my vicious demons.

5 years later, here I am at the start of the OCC by UTMB, 60 km, 3500 meters of positive altitude difference. I’m not impressed by the distance, but by the altitude difference. I like to swallow the kilometers when others swallow a pot of ice cream to ease their suffering. The longer I run, the better I feel, so 60 km…that’s a 1⁄2 pot of ice cream!

Race watch

On the eve of the race, I’m feeling serene, but I’m secretly afraid of the gradient that will challenge my balance and my back, a gradient that will inevitably twist my body as I climb the sometimes endless slopes.

Race eve, the weather looks complicated, the course changes and I realize that I’m going to face the same hellish climb as in 2024 on the MCC.

My doubts settle in and camp all night in my mind. I’ve felt my back weakening over the last few months and I’m seriously wondering whether I’ll be able to hold out physically.

Will my back, tired from my daily imbalance, endure this 4-hour climb I know without a hint of flatness? It’s hard to know how my body will cope, but what I know above all is that I won’t be able to bear not crossing the finish line.

I refocus and fall asleep, ready to start this race to give myself pleasure and deliverance.

Departure of the OCC

D-Day, like every race start, is an emotional moment, a rendezvous with myself. I find myself in the starting hatch among all these runners, who have also come to challenge themselves for a quest of their own.

I let my tears join the party, tears of immense joy at being here, tears of exhaustion after all the ground I’ve covered, after this fight against myself, against others, a fight against this difference with which I try to cohabit, each day a little better.

Our cohabitation has progressed well and we’re ready, my difference and I, to set off on the 60 km through the magnificent trails of Orsières, Champex and Chamonix.

First kilometers on the OCC

I unwind for the first few kilometers until the first descents. Very steep descents, very narrow and technical trails. No surprise there, I say to myself, you’re in the mountains, Claire!

I’m still surprised by how off-balance I am , putting my body to the test very quickly. Twisting, fear of falling, fear of hurting myself, confidence close to nil.

It’s at these very moments that sport reminds us of its extraordinary capacity to make us go further, to surpass ourselves no matter what. I’m quickly brought back to the fundamentals of running.

No matter how much you suffer,
No matter how difficult it is,
No matter how challenging it is, you go for it, you give yourself and you look for all the resources you need to let your mind shine.

Ascent to Col de la Balme

I apply these fundamentals without moderation. I then set off on these steep kilometers, concentrated, so concentrated that I forgot to eat for 25 kilometers… I find myself in the red zone at the foot of the climb I dread so much. Energy at a standstill, heartache, thigh cramps. For the 1st time in 5 years of running, I’m wondering how I’m going to make it to the end!

I remember why I’m here, what I’m looking for and why I’m running. Unsurprisingly, I instantly find answers to my questions, and my mind refocuses with a touch of rage. Rage to dig deep down inside myself, rage to go out and soothe the debris of suffering still clinging to me, which, I understand, will surely always be there…

My mind is whispering to me to seek total acceptance through this race. My head and my legs set off with two clear objectives: to enjoy myself and to cope with the difficulties that my body sometimes imposes on me in this demanding discipline, to cope with gentleness and not frustration. The trail is demanding, but it has the power to transform all ills into extraordinary adventures; the trail has the power to make us bigger in spirit, it has the power to lead us towards a unique serenity.

These values will guide me on my final ascent to the Col de Balme. I arrive at the top drained but relieved. Above all, I arrived at the top feeling fulfilled! This first part of the race was very challenging, surely the most challenging of all my races. After so much effort, I stop and savor this timeless moment before starting the descent.

Descent and final kilometers

The downhill rhymes with pleasure, the fabulous pleasure of running with a light heart. Despite the difficulty of the terrain at times, I feel liberated, carried away by the trails in total disconnection, close to hypnosis! Despite the cold and rain, this descent is a source of absolute happiness.

Some climbs come to challenge me again, but the power of endorphins is such that my body & mind are not overcome by the slightest doubt.

As night falls, I switch on my headlamp and continue to let myself be lulled by the course. I love running at night, probably because, unconsciously or consciously, my body drowns in the darkness that erases all difference… I love the feeling of complete escape that night gives me. I run for miles on end, taking advantage of this unique interlude.

An aside, sometimes provocative, but one that I know will always bring me an explosive finish!
And what an arrival!

Arrival

At 10pm, I arrive in Chamonix to the bustle of all those athletes who have come to share an exceptional sporting moment.

I arrive at the side of my guide Daniel Ratao, an extraordinary guide, with an extraordinary benevolence and generosity. A guide who listened to my moods, my sorrows, my joys, with unfailing energy. Daniel and I arrive in the streets of Chamonix, proud to have completed this demanding race together .

I run alongside him, my mind and body full of positive energy, full of happiness. 500 metres from the finishing arch, I run, proud to have reached deep inside myself, I run, happy to have shaken off my suffering to emerge even taller and freer!

That’s the MAGIC OF TRAIL!